


Buck, please!

by ToughPaperRound



Category: 9-1-1 (TV)
Genre: 911 crack, Acting, Breaking the Fourth Wall, Brief mentions of ensemble cast, Crack, Crack Crossover, M/M, Podfic Welcome, Well peeking over it at least, background actors
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2019-11-28
Updated: 2019-11-28
Packaged: 2021-02-26 02:01:05
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 963
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/21595771
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/ToughPaperRound/pseuds/ToughPaperRound
Summary: Eddie has a confusing morning with some co-workers at the 118 firehouse
Relationships: Evan "Buck" Buckley/Eddie Diaz
Comments: 16
Kudos: 61





	Buck, please!

**Author's Note:**

> Hi! First timer here for 911 fics.  
> This is short and cracky, hope you like it!
> 
> Please note, I know nothing about Unions and made stuff up to make my story work. Check with your Representative before making important decisions please.  
> Thanks as always to Mansikka for the encouragement 💕
> 
> Extra points to anyone who knows who the Extra is and which comic he comes from. He seems to be on short-term loan to the 118?

Eddie is working with one of the firefighters at the 118 LAFD firehouse, trying to get them to talk to him without much success. They use hand signals and eyebrow waggles to get their work done in the end.

Eddie reflects back on how it's been like this since he started - some of the firefighters who work at 118 always seem to hang back while he's talking with Chim or Hen, his Buck or Bobby. It's very strange. It's always a different random firefighter who sits on the corner seat at dinner, or on the seat by the cab door on the ladder truck. They never talk, they never draw attention. And yet they are everywhere.

Sometimes Eddie thinks that perhaps they can't talk? It's like they are prevented from talking somehow.

Another firefighter, the tall Canadian one that always confuses Eddie, appears at his elbow. (How does he always manage to do that?) He's called Johnson. No nickname, which is unusual in this firehouse.

At least, it seems to be him? He's wearing full turnout gear and the helmet obscures his face.

He says to Eddie, "Yeah, Mr Diaz, it's the Union rules man! 'Any action by a performer on set that is seen to communicate a Plot Point is automatically set at Grade B and there shall be no negotiation downwards'. And as we all know, B is for budget, baby!"

"Anyway I know I have to get on and deliver this line and then I'll be outta your hair, OK pretty boy?"

"Now where were we? Forget my own script if it wasn't emailed to me the night before. Oh yes! 'Cap wants to see you (points stage left to Captain's office)'." He looks proud, and then jerkily points over his right shoulder.

"Huh? Oh! What's it about?" asks Eddie, getting up from where he was crouched at work. He looked to his colleague to see if they had understood Johnson any better, but the first firefighter had disappeared, just abandoning the mess of gear on the floor. Strange.

"Well I don't know, but I think maybe he saw the rushes from last night and he wants to talk to you two about where things are going with Buck," says Johnson, and judging by the tone of voice he's waggling his eyebrows under all that gear. "That kind of thing can affect team cohesion, I'm sure he'd say, eh?"

"Rushes? Pardon?" Eddie remembers again how every conversation with Johnson ends up with him being very confused, so he just says, "I'll just go and see Cap…"

"Yeah ok! I gotta just say tho, wow man great work last night! Really great work, it's a privilege to work in the background behind you guys, lifting stuff up and putting it back down again, or cleaning trucks that haven't been outside in a week. To see you guys putting the effort in like you do, well you do the show proud, man! Even us little guys who aren't part of the firefam, we still like to see the show doing well."

"I hear we were trending on Tumblr last night, that's always good news, eh?"

"Good work last night?" asked Eddie, "What d'ya mean? I wasn't on duty last night. My son and I went to have pizza, then we beat Buck at video games. No work there, trust me!"

"Aww yes, I saw how Chris looked so happy, it's lovely to see him relaxed, man. A chill night with his dads was just what he needed. And you, too, I imagine - after that heavy solo scene last week. All that with no menthol tear stick? Kudos, man. Kudos."

"Oh, hey, maybe Cap wants to rehash that line he had in episode 8, ya know - the old Minnesotan Metaphor about how ya CAN have both… hmm?" and now Johnson's heavy tone suggests that he is winking, somewhere under that helmet.

"The Minnesotan what now? Pardon?"

"Figure skating versus the Great Game, eh? I mean - it's rather heternormative to my mind but Nash's character is written as kinda old school in some ways, I guess."

"And it seemed to fall on deaf ears with you two oblivious doofusses so perhaps it's just going to have to act as foreshadowing instead, eh? Always worth another take though, cos it's gonna come right in the edit."

"Right…" As always, talking with Johnson was inducing a headache in Eddie. "Whatever you say, Johnson. Umm... Better not keep Cap waiting?"

"Yup. Oh! I was talking to Betty in Set Design about last night's amazing scene in the kitchen. Haha! She said that even  **she** was convinced Buck was going to snog you, and she'd seen the script! Hilarious, eh?"

"But, and you'll laugh at this, she said 'thank heavens they _didn't_ slam down on that kitchen worktop cos it's pretty much just made of balsa wood held together with PVA, bubblegum and varnish'. Lol! Can you imagine the scheduling delays there, ugh!"

"Anyway I reassured her that you two are at least three episodes away from any slamming action cos we have to get thru hiatus and the dramatic denouement first."

"But she was really pleased that you guys are going to be looking for a new pad together after episode 16 cos she's sick and tired of patching up the veneer around that fridge. Buck's last set was much better quality, they had a great budget on that one, eh?"

Eddie backs away, holding his temples firmly and promising himself he would grab some water and painkillers on his way to Cap's office.

Johnson had one last thing to say, though, before disappearing again, "Yes, great work! It's gonna be a nomination for sure at the Glaad awards next year, you mark my words, Mr Diaz!"

**Author's Note:**

> If you like this, please consider sharing this post on [Tumblr](https://toughpaperround.tumblr.com/post/189353593748/buck-please-911/)


End file.
